How to Identify Bullying and Put an End to it

Many children experience bullying in one form or another, usually while they are at school. Bullying is defined as intentional aggressive behaviour that involves an imbalance of power or strength. While bullying and fighting can look similar, it is important to learn how to tell them apart. Fighting takes place between two or more people of equal power whether in terms of strength, size, or intellect. In contrast, bullying involves an imbalance of power, where one person holds more power be it physical, social, or psychological and uses it aggressively to harm or dominate someone else. 

Bullying can take on many shapes:

• Physical: Hitting or kicking someone or doing something that causes physical harm to the other.

• Verbal: Teasing, threatening, name-calling, yelling, harassment, revealing secrets, starting rumours, giving the silent treatment.

Historically, bullying has primarily taken place in the real world, however, with the increase in technological communication, it has become all too common in the digital world, as well. All types of bullying can have adverse mental health effects.

Teachers or parents must address bullying as soon as they become aware of it, as this can prevent serious psychological and developmental damage to the child. Bullying has been shown to lead to a loss in self-esteem, and, in extreme cases, suicide. Children don't always tell their parents or school supervisors that they are being bullied, but there are signs that can help parents determine whether their children are facing bullies at school or online.

These include:

• Your child displays signs of anxiety or depression

• Your child avoids social settings

• You notice a change in your child’s personality

If you suspect your child is being bullied, it is important to talk to them as soon as possible. Stay calm and listen to what they have to say. Try to empathise with their situation and thank them for letting you know. When parents intervene, it almost always puts an end to the bullying and can help prevent more harm.

It's also important to be able to notice if a child is the one being the bully. If this is the case, it often points to the fact that the child is imitating aggressive behaviours they have seen or experienced at home with parents or siblings who may be physically or verbally abusive toward them. They may also be imitating violence that they have seen on TV, the internet, or in video games. Bullies may also be suffering from self-esteem issues and may use bullying as a way to gain popularity and a sense of control at school.

In either case, whether your child is being bullied or is the bully, you may find it helpful to talk to an expert to address the issue. You can also reach out to the school to integrate anti-bullying strategies and provide mental health support early on, so that children can keep moving forward in a positive trajectory at school and in their personal life.

The Humtastic wellbeing team

The content of this article is not intended to be a substitute for professional medical advice, diagnosis, or treatment. We encourage seeking help from a practitioner. Visit humtastic.com